Seniors today live longer and stay more active than past generations — and more are also living independently. Over the last decade, the number of older adults in nursing homes and assisted living has shrunk, according to the Population Reference Bureau. Of those under 85 years old, an increased number maintained their independence with home modifications or assistive devices to meet their daily care needs. Yet, many also needed help with mobility and self-care.
Older adults may not ask for assistance if they need it, and it may not be clear to their children or loved ones — especially if the changes are more gradual and not the result of an emergency, illness, or major diagnosis. By being aware of areas of concern, you can help them maintain their independence and quality of life while avoiding bigger problems with their health, safety, and finances.
Deciding when to have conversations with your aging loved ones about their health, finances, and well-being can be difficult. Here are a few signs an older adult may need help, and these can be used as talking points to start having conversations with them.
Signs an older adult needs help
Some changes in older adults are part of the natural aging process. For example, they may move more slowly over time, occasionally forget or misplace things, or have reduced problem-solving ability. Here are areas to be aware of during visits with your loved ones:
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Mobility problems
- Frequent unsteadiness
- Difficulty getting up
- Inability to walk usual distances
- Falling or tripping
- Unexplained bruising
Options to help: Schedule a mobility assessment with their healthcare provider, who can recommend assistive devices to support them in safely completing daily tasks, such as a cane, walker, or grab bars. Here’s an overview of mobility aids from American Family Physician. A provider also can help them understand limitations or caregiving needs. Balance and coordination exercises can improve mobility, and a physical therapist can help. Get more information from Health in Aging’s Caregiver Guide: Mobility Problems.
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Health issues
- Weight loss or gain
- Poor diet
- Forgetting medication
- Loss of hearing
Options to help: Confirm regular doctor’s visits are scheduled to help ensure senior loved ones get proper preventive healthcare and to detect issues before they become severe. Help them set a routine for preparing meals and tracking medication. Discuss caregiving support options, such as in-home services. Get more information about types of common chronic health problems for older adults from the CDC’s Healthy 2030 initiative.
- Hygiene changes
- Disheveled appearance
- Lack of grooming
- Difficulty bathing or dressing
Options to help: Help them set a routine for daily care, and discuss caregiving support. Explore home modifications, such as shower chairs, grab bars, or raised toilet seats. Shop for adaptive tools for bathing and hygiene, such as bathroom utensil holders or long-handled devices, and dressing aids, like a button hook and zipper pull or toileting wand. Here’s common equipment from the Mayo Clinic.
- Driving problems
- Poor driving habits
- Unexplained dents or scratches on a vehicle
- Traffic violations or accidents
- Trouble judging distances in the dark
Options to help: Use technology to check on their driving safety for your peace of mind. Greenlight Family Shield provides driving reports with alerts and personalized insights, in addition to family location sharing with place alerts, SOS alerts, and crash detection. Work together to proactively discuss driving in the future and what to do when it’s no longer safe for them to drive. Alternative transport could include family support, ride-sharing services, or community shuttles.
- Emotional changes
- Social withdrawal
- Mood swings
- Depression
- Loss of interest in hobbies and activities
Options to help: Encourage them to share their feelings and listen with empathy. Explore local senior groups or hobbies and activities to encourage social interaction. Schedule a mental health consultation for evaluation and treatment options. Read more about mental and emotional health for older adults from the National Institute on Aging.
- Cognitive changes
- Getting lost
- Forgetting important appointments
- Confusion with familiar tasks
- Trouble with speaking
- Difficulty communicating
Options to help: Schedule a cognitive assessment — often included in wellness checkups for older adults — to check for problems with memory, thinking processes, and language. Early detection is beneficial for treatment. Brain exercises like puzzles and games, can improve memory and thinking.
- Struggles with daily chores
- Clutter or disorganization
- Unkept house or yard
- Laundry, dishes, or trash piling up
- Unsafe conditions (such as leaving the stove on after cooking or keeping spoiled food)
Options to help: Assist with household chores yourself and/or create a support schedule for them with other relatives, friends, or neighbors. Assess their housing situation and discuss whether they need more regular, professional caregiving support. Use the home safety for seniors checklist on our blog.
- Financial mishaps and concerns
- Unpaid bills
- Unusual transactions
- Missing funds
- Fraud attempts
Options to help: Set up protections like Greenlight Family Shield. Add a second (and third!) set of eyes on their accounts with alerts for suspicious activity, large transactions, low balances, and more. Help them spend safely with a debit card that has flexible controls and purchase protection.
If you notice any of these signs or an increase in the frequency of these issues, it may be time to engage in conversations about getting additional support for your older loved ones.
The Bottom Line
It’s not always easy to know when your aging parent needs more help or what steps you should take. By being aware of these signs, you can support their well-being and quality of life as they get older.
When you start the caregiving conversation early, you’re laying the groundwork to make the most informed decisions to fulfill your senior loved one’s wishes for their future. Here are some additional articles on ways to help protect your aging parent from scams and the tools that are available.
Care needs can change over time, so it’s important to continue monitoring to determine if any changes should be made to their level of care. Engage with empathy and lean on the support around you.
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